Tourists from Hell

May 22, 2012By 4 Comments

Tourists. Everywhere. It is that time of year again. We are invaded. INVADED.

They come in masses. They come with attitudes. They come with their entire families. Tourists. Oh how I dislike thee.

In our small town, the tourists are not our favourite. Sure, they bring great business. The town relies on them, but sadly, I’d prefer some pleasant ones.

We went to the grocery store first thing Saturday morning, knowing what it was going to be like. Sadly, it was already bombarded. Trying to maneuver our small little grocery store with people who don’t know where anything is and will willingly walk right over you, makes you want to snap necks. Now doing this, with two children who want everything they see and not paying attention to anything, makes you really want to snap necks.

Now, for the next 2-3 months, we have the joy of dealing with tourists every single weekend. Not many stay for weeks on end, but some do. It makes weekends dreadful around here. Makes most of the townspeople go into hiding.

The tourists also don’t seem to know what speed signs are. Now, the locals don’t either, but they at least know to watch for the little guys out there. During the weekends, I try my best to avoid my guys out on the front because in the end, these tourists really don’t know how to slow the hell down!

Fingers crossed the cops take advantage and sit on our road since most people do speed on it. Frig, sit in my driveway. I’ll bring you coffee and make you fresh doughnuts!

The long weekend is ALMOST over. One more day.

The roads will be crazy. It is a day anyone who lives in cottage country avoids driving anywhere. You will find yourself stuck in grid lock, for hours. It is only a two lane highway and there is always at least 2 to 3 accidents that slows things right down. Not many exits either.

Dealing with tourists can be exhausting. That is why I hide. If we have to go out, it is either first thing in the morning or after dinner. We never go anywhere that involves driving out of town, because that is just not a smart idea.

Our long weekend involved a lot of time in the yard. It does get hard entertaining two kids for 3 days straight, but thankfully, we managed. I bought a sprinkler, set that up and that kept them amused long enough for me to not blow my brains out.

This weekend, was a beautiful weekend. The heat swept in and took over fast. Sunday, it was impossible to get the kids out doors. They are like me in some aspects. They hate being hot. The sprinkler only kept them cool for so long. Once they hit that point of completely done, they are done.

At that point, I still had a few hours before we could adventure off of our property so we could avoid the tourists. Thank goodness for long movies about animals and all things Life! Their current massive addiction that I am a okay with. It is nice not watching kid movies and enjoying something educational.

By dinner time, it becomes safe to leave the premises, so we adventured out for dinner, both Saturday & Sunday. Yep, that’s right. I didn’t cook dinner ALL weekend. It was too hot. I was too hot. I was exhausted, and in reality. Not in the mood. I pulled a “best Mommy ever!” and went out for dinner, two nights in a row. Whatever! They were fed and that’s all that matters.

The tourists seem to all vacate to their cottages right before dinner hour, so the town goes quiet for a few more hours, before they all adventure out impaired going to the local bar. It makes it perfect timing to get out for a nice evening stroll with the kiddies and wear off the last of their energy. And then I didn’t have to cook!

Monday, is going to be insane. The gas stations will be slammed. Our small little restaurant will guaranteed be very busy we everyone getting one last meal before the trek home. Fingers crossed Tuesday, everything is all quiet again.

Tourists. Why!? Why can’t you be nice? Why can’t you not be pushy? Yes, we know you don’t know where anything is. Doesn’t mean you have to be snotty and rude. Yes, we live in a small town. This doesn’t make us any less then you. We are the smart folk that stay in cottage country year round, enjoying the beauty it has without ever having to sit in traffic for 5 hours! Yep, we are the smart ones.

If you haven’t noticed, I don’t like our tourists. They are the worst aspect of summer time. Love summer, hate what summer brings. You’d think I’d be used to them after 17 years, but nope!

Do you get a lot of tourists in your town? How do you handle it? Do you travel somewhere and take over peaceful little towns?!

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About the Author ()

A Mom of 2 very hyper children, ages 6 & 7. They can be a handful, but I love every minute of it! I work from home full time on top of being a full time stay at home Mom. Multi-tasking is a definite speciality I’ve learned over the past 7 years, and I surely can juggle just about everything.

Comments (4)

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  1. Whenever I visit a new town, I like to immediately act as though I own it. Please stay out of my way, I don’t need help finding anything and if I still can’t find it, I’ll just take it from your cart!

    Good luck this season!

  2. Cheryl says:

    having lived in a tourist town I TOTALLY understand how you feel! So brutal! I hope the summer passes quickly?? :)

  3. SoberJulie says:

    Well I’m one of those tourists and wish they could be nicer too! My fellow vacationers are so often caught up in rushing to get the shopping done to go relax they’re awful to be around. I’ll be thinking of you.

  4. Jennifer says:

    living in cottage country can be tough! tourists suck lol except when you are the tourist, than it’s cool lol

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